I told Him there was only one thing I wanted to pray for and that wasn’t the right thing to pray for and I apologised. I told Him I was sorry but that’s all I wanted to pray for tonight. I told Him that prayer isn’t what is said but what is felt, which is why at night I shut my eyes and ears and every other door to the world and let my heart speak out loud and sometimes I feel God right there next to my heart, directing all my senses, making everything all right. It puzzles me then that I can still feel like that tonight - is this His will or is this mine?